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Loneliness Solutions And Things Pertaining To Relating


Search Out Ways To Do Things With People.

Find ways to be around people more. Activities that involve other people — such as an Arts or Crafts Group, Walking Group, Exercise Class, engaging in Sports etc are also likely to have positive effects on our emotional and mental health. People like to share interests in common and this could prove to be a good outlet for you.
It helped me out of a state of boredom years ago when I went to see what a Craft Group had to offer. Previously, I was never a crafts person, so this was new to me.
I actually developed a passionate interest and I enjoyed the company of women there for quite some time before returning to part-time Independent Natural Health Research. Their conversation was light and this can be a welcome change from friends continuously problem sharing, for some of us.

Talk To Strangers When You Go Out.

Research suggests that even small interactions with strangers — like chatting with a barista or cashier — may be able to keep loneliness at bay by helping us feel more socially connected. So reach out to others around you - say hi, ask them how they are, or chat about something that could be of interest. Keep it light, refrain from serious - people have so much of that these days.

Take Small Steps, One At A Time.

Small acts like those above, can make a big difference and help you reduce feelings of loneliness. They help us to feel engaged and can impart a little confidence in relating with others.

Consider How You Spend Your Spare Time.

People who feel lonely often retreat from life around them - maybe watching Netflix etc. Some make endless to-do lists leaving them too exhausted to go out and be social. Opting to stay alone every night with smartphones, watching Netflix, or spending lots of time on Facebook can actually perpetuate a life we don't really want for ourselves - creating a life that deprives us of Meaningful Social Connection. We need to start living differently. Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.

Opt For These If You Can.

It's best to be proactive and use the loneliness to motivate us to reach out to people, then we can maybe strengthen some relationships we have probably neglected spending time on, whatever.

"By opting to cope with loneliness by seeking out social support, we create more social moments with people in our lives who matter to us, which usually reduces loneliness" Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.

Practice Self-Kindness And To Others.

"In difficult moments, it's essential to practice self-kindness. Blaming ourselves when we feel lonely is not helpful. So limit negative self-talk, take care of yourself and give yourself a break. Perhaps a walk in nature or a day at the spa may be helpful for getting yourself into a self-kindness mood" Tchiki Davis, Ph.D.

Sometimes we can limit our Friendships or Engagements with others when taking offense at small things or when someone really offends. And sometimes, high standards we set for ourselves, we also set for others, not giving the benefit of the doubt in our recall of certain conversations, allowing people to express or be themselves, or falter in communications (they may not always be at their best - we may not either, in the way we interpret). If we don't watch this, we may even terminate a good friendship.

I actually did that once, when tired of other's thoughtless words or actions. I decided that was enough. Maybe you have done the same or know someone who has. Because people are people (the human condition) we live in a world of offenses and imperfections. Also, we're living in a stressful world like never before hey? Not many people are at their best all the time - including ourselves:)

So try not to be the worse for wear if someone does offend. Truth of the matter is, offenses are an inevitable part of life. It is also true that some of the best marriages and friendships have an occasional argument or difference of opinion. The secret is, it's the way we handle differences or offenses that makes meaningful relationships, not the absence of them.

Things To Consider.

Some people end up becoming loners because they take offenses in all relationships. This can be due to poor upbringing with abrasive or neglectful parents OR busy parents who did not make enough time for social interaction or pass on communication skills to their kids. This is so common these days, and can go 2 or 3 generations deep in some families. So sometimes we need to make some allowances - for the other person and ourselves because they may need to find their way and learn that friendships can be a little kinder sometimes. These can be quite nice people who need to learn to express themselves appropriately on certain occasions.

Janets Family Story

Mark my words, in this Modern Generation, many of these people do exist and you could be one of them. If that is you, I do feel for you because my family were too busy for social engagements and did not teach me any communication skills - though I did find my mother to be a very caring person some years later when she wasn't kept so busy helping dad with a small business. He actually invested more time communicating with his customers than he did with us. My mum took quite some years after separation to discover and express herself - life was so centered around his interests and ambitions. That wasn't fair to her or to me.

We developed a very close relationship for the rest of her life after I found Jesus and felt led to take a personal interest in her - she opened up like a beautiful flower when I showed interest in some things she was doing. I even learnt some knitting at one time to share one of her interests - she loved it and was happy to help me pick up any loose stitches. Years later, she commented from time to time, when living interstate with my sister, about those two items I knitted with her, how even my knitting was. She remembered that time together well into her 80s. Sometimes it's in filling someone's well that ours also is filled.

After separation, my two brothers went to two different states to live (as teenagers) and Mum hid her life in my baby Sister (a toddler at that time). Later in life, I perceived that my Mum was quite devastated, with having her husband leave, and two young Sons - she felt very empty on the inside. There were unspoken emotions that were not visible for some years - she never shared them.

When my Sister grew up and went interstate to find work, my Mum commenced going to Social Groups like she did when I was little and this did something for her. Sometimes we do not understand certain things until we're older and wiser, why some parents weren't what we would have liked them to be. So often, people are not ready to be parents, and I really feel for their children. That so often makes us the people we are throughout life.

Some Thoughts And Observations.

A family member has a saying "everyone has a story" and that is so true. Everyone we see around us in daily life has a story of some kind - spoken or unspoken - happy or sad, empty and searching, fulfilling and satisfying, stressful and challenging, upsetting and disturbing….. concerning their upbringing (that shapes each person's character, emotions and thought-life). Not many people have had a really nice background these days. Can you see here, there are plenty of reasons why many people do not make the best marriage partners or friends, or even parents sometimes - for three generations now. So it does not pay to expect perfection (so to speak) in a marriage or friendship. We need to make some allowances and work at things closely together. A marriage or friendship can be worth it's weight in gold when we do.

Best wishes to all reading this. Have a good day or evening!